Friday, January 29, 2010

The Chris-R Scene

Though I have my own personal favorite scene in the movie (I'll give you a hint: its less than a minute long but really steals the show) I would have to say that the Chris-R scene is perhaps the most dominating and thought-provoking scene in the movie.

Armed with so much non-sense, and so many random happenings, it's perhaps the MVP scene of the movie.  It's like saying your favorite quarterback is Donovan McNabb, even though he's obviously not quite as good as Peyton Manning. 

So to write about the entire scene in one post just wouldn't be possible without hitting 20 pages and boring you to death.  We have to break it down piece by piece.

Let's start with the "Just gimme five minutes" line from Denny.

Really Denny?  The money is gonna be there in five minutes?  This is either a lie so that Denny could buy himself an extra... FIVE MINUTES... or another completely random character shows up on the rooftop after the scene ends with however much money Denny owes Chris-R.  Because it probably couldn't be a character we already know since they all somehow SHOW UP ON THE ROOF.

Denny, what were you going to do when five minutes had past and no money was there?  "Gimme another five, just another FIVE!  Come on, lets toss the football."

"But you have a basketball this time"

"Oh, huh, thats weird."

Also, for Chris-R... if the money was that important to you, you couldn't wait five minutes to see if Denny was telling the truth? 

Come on Chris-R, give him five.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Popular Movie?

Type "Screenings" in the Google search bar and check what the second hit is.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

"I like to watch"

One of the greatest things about Tommy Wiseau is that he allows the viewer to make up their own mind on who each character is and their relationship to the other characters.  At least, that is what I would like to believe his intent was when Denny was introduced in the first scene, dressed and acting as if he was a 12-year-old, and looking as if he was in between the ages of 16 and 28. 

The audience is left pondering "Who are you?!" 

We don't know if Denny is a neighbor, friend, son, brother and little information is given to sway us one way or the other. 

However, our confusion gets pushed to another level when Denny insists on watching Lisa and Johnny have sex. 

And at this point we really still can't even eliminate Denny as being a family member.  I think within the first five minutes you are so awestruck with what you've already seen that nothing will surprise you.  And later when we find out that Denny is an adult that Johnny wanted to adopt, really he is like family.  Family that wants to see Mommy and Daddy pillow fight and watch Daddy hump Mommy in the belly button, and oh by the way is in college or close to it. 

However perhaps the most disturbing thing about "I like to watch" is this quote from Tommy Wiseau from his interview on

"to relationship between two is better than one, or three is better than two, or vice versa, two is better than three—you know, when Denny says, “I like to watch,” look at kids today. I have nephews myself. And I say, what are you doing here? “Oh yeah, I just want to watch.” In a very innocent way."


Dear God, if even 10 percent of this movie is based on Tommy Wiseau's real life, I think we have a serious crisis on our hands.  I'd hate to think that Chris-R is a real person too or that he's the favorite customer at ANY flower shop.

The more I think about it, I also have to point out this little tidbit; why are Johnny and Lisa so rude?  Can you hold off on the sex until after the adopted man-child leaves, rather than saying "We are going upstairs now and you can't come." 

Have you ever been over to somebody's house and they immediately said they were going up to their room and it was obvious it was going to happen?  I know Johnny was a real romantic guy just then with the present he bought you, but give it a rest Lisa.  You'll have your nips covered in rose pedals in no time.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Oh, Hi Readers: Why We are Here

Let’s get past the easy stuff first. If you are at this website, I’m going to assume you have watched the room AND know who Tommy Wiseau is. If you haven’t or you don’t, that’s perfectly fine and acceptable. I encourage you to watch the film or even just read about it.

I got plenty of pure enjoyment out of reading about The Room before I ever saw it, and it didn’t ruin the film for me one iota. Trust me, there is so much to this movie that it will take me quite a long time of writing this website to have ruined every tidbit of The Room.

When Tommy Wiseau says you need to see his movie “at least four times,” he actually makes a good point. Not unlike Memento, there are many layers to this film and trust me you WILL miss things in your first couple of viewings.

The line that sold me on having to watch the room, “I DEFINITELY have breast cancer,” came and went so quickly (just as advertised) that I didn’t notice it through my first TWO viewings of The Room. And that’s even when the chapter of the scene has “CANCER” right in the title.

So much goes wrong in the 99 minutes of The Room that you have a hard time keeping up. It seems as though every day I can think of another scene, moment, or line that makes me shake my head in disbelief. Tommy Wiseau made more mistakes than NBC’s late-night lineup! (Current events humor! As to help me date these posts when I read them 10 years from now.)

I will go over a lot in this blog. Things like analyzing each scene and where it went horribly wrong, the cultural effect of The Room, and what exactly constitutes “Worst Movie Ever”?

Because as far as the “Worst Movie Ever” title goes, there is definitely cause for debate.

For instance, would you eat the “Worst Apple Ever”?

Would an NBA team sign the “Worst Basketball Player” ever? (The Clippers notwithstanding. Let’s hope they haven’t won any championships by 2020 or I’ll have egg on my face!)

But I will tell you that I can watch The Room over and over again. How can it truly be the “worst” when I’d much rather watch it 1000 times than ever sit through P.S. I Love You again. (Though that came out when I was in a relationship, I sadly admit I saw it alone months later when I was single. And yes, it’s horrible even by the standards that its a romantic comedy starring Hilary Swank and Gerard Butler.)

So with all of that I give you My Thoughts on The Room. I can’t help but admit that it accounts for at least 5 percent of my daily thoughts and that definitely warrants me starting a journal to get those thoughts out of my head and onto a worldwide medium. Many years ago Tommy Wiseau did something similar with his thoughts, and now look at the beautiful mess that is: The Room.

What is this?

This is a blog that will be dedicated to getting out of my head all of the thoughts on the movie The Room.

If I don't find an avenue to do this, I fear I will die.